Weigh Loss Journey. Part 3. Eating.
Diets.
Losing weight & losing self.
Why do I believe diets do not serve us and why they usually don’t work?
I was following countless diets - without major results. Where was the problem? The answer is simple:
When we follow a specific diet we are waiting for someone else to tell us what to eat - leaving our own needs far behind and staying totally away from our own body and its needs.
Then,
We give our power away.
We move even further away from ourselves.
The true needs of our bodies are left far behind.
We let other people decide for us and our bodies.
We do not listen to ourselves and our bodies at all.
We leave the control over ourselves to someone else.
We trust someone else more than we trust ourselves.
We let external factors decide what to do without honoring ourselves in the first place.
And, if we do not leave the space for internal dialogue - that is a recipe for disaster.
Losing weight & losing self.
* I tried to portray how I see this dynamic in the illustrations below:
the left image - doing&acting based on others - the energy leaves the body
vs
the right image - doing&acting based on self - the energy comes to the body
The same applies to other activities such as going to the gym, “doing steps”, etc. (btw. will we count breaths on our watches too?)
Do I work out because I want to?
Do I work out because I feel my body wants to move?
or
Do I force myself to do the workout?
Do I work out because I have to / I should?
Do I work out because my trainer told me so?
Am I walking because it feels good?
Am I walking because I want to feel the fresh air?
or
Am I walking because I count the steps?
Intermittent Fasting - a Means for Self Harm.
I am aware of fasting’s health benefits.
I am also aware of the damage it caused to me.
When my body needed food - I was stressing it by any means not giving it what it needed.
It tried to communicate.
The louder it screamed - the more punishment it got.
When I was starving myself - my body learned I don’t listen to it - so it can’t trust me.
Then, whenever I had access to food -I was eating more than I would normally have - as, subconsciously, I was afraid the food would be gone again. And indeed it was gone again. Fasting after fasting.
My hunger cues were irregulated.
I could not trust myself with eating.
I thought I was in control by fasting.
In turn, the food had control over me.
Nothing lasts long when done by force.
That’s why so many people talk about a lifestyle change - not a diet change.
2. Intuitive Eating
Step by Step. Trust Yourself.
It took about a year for my body to trust me again.
How?
Step by step.
After I stopped trying to lose weight - I had to learn to eat normally. The idea of intuitive eating helped me.
Before I had a meal, I always asked myself - What do you really want to eat? - I was tuning in myself and taking the time to feel the answer.
Then I was taking a specific food and asking my body again if that was really what it wanted. I was asking once again while eating.
During the meal, I was asking whether my body wanted to eat more, or whether it was already enough. I never said no to an additional portion of food - as I was honoring my needs.
That way, step by step, I let my body trust me, and I developed hunger cues again.
What a change! I could feel satisfaction instead of unstopping hunger.
Meanwhile, I felt my body did not like to take insulin-resistance pills. I honored it - and I stopped taking them until today.
From one chocolate bar a day to one chocolate bar a month.
Before,
Having sweets at home was making me nervous. I could not stop thinking about them.
Either I had to eat them all - or to throw them away. There was no in-between.
Their presence was making me nervous and out of control.
Because,
“If I have sweets at home -> I will eat them all -> I will feel bad -> better not to have them at all.”
Now,
I have a drawer full of various sweets and the only reason they end up in the garbage is their expiry date.
How?
Step by step. By building trust. By communicating with my needs.
Example:
I want chocolate.
I take the bar and tell myself I can eat as much as I want.
I can eat the whole bar - and, if I still want more - I will give myself more.
If I want to eat 6 chocolate bars every day of the week - I will.During eating, I am trying to feel whether I am satisfied and if I want more.
If yes - I continue eating.
If not - I stop - but I allow myself to eat again whenever I want.Repeat every time.
Miracle!
It turns out - I don’t want to eat chocolate every day. But until I realized that - it took me about a year of conscious work around food accompanied by internal supportive dialog.
When I know I can eat as much sweets as I want, without feeling guilty (because it’s just what my body wants), surprisingly, I crave sweets waaaay less than I ever used to.
Good and Bad Food
Here I want to mention that Intuitive Eating rejects the idea of categorizing food as good or bad.
There is no need for a “cheat day” or “clean food” label.
The only approach to eating is to feel and tune in to what kind of nutrition your body truly wants and honor that - without judgment and guilt around food.
3. Specific Foods & Way of Eating.
Additional Help.
Throughout the time I noticed that some “tricks” help me balance glucose spikes, keep me full & satisfied after meals, limiting the sudden rise of hunger during the day — in the long run contributing to keeping my body weight stable.
I don’t treat them as rules - rather as guidelines.
I avoid eating “naked” sweets and high-carb products.
Instead of eating chocolate alone - I add some almonds and yogurt on a side.
In turn, I feel full & satisfied, not having a big sugar spike after (which usually makes me very hungry and irritated.)Instead of eating dry bread alone - I spread butter on it (a big amount.)
Instead of eating candy on an empty stomach - I eat it after a meal.
When eating pizza or other high-carb products - I eat the parts with filling.
I think what I can add to a meal - not what to substruct.
Instead of thinking - “olive oil is high in calories” I consider “olive oil is high in nutrients and it makes the blood sugar stable”
Instead of thinking “I should eat less calories” I consider “I will add an egg to this meal to make it more balanced and rich”
I start a meal by eating vegetables & protein first, followed by fats and carbs.
When I have a salad, meat, and french fries on a plate - I start by having a bite of salad, meat, and at the end the fries.
I resigned from “zero-sugar” products sweetened by sweeteners.
I noticed they made me even more hungry after eating, irritated & not satisfied.I eat meat & butter.
Nothing makes me full & satisfied as the meat does. I can feel it serves my organism.
8/10 breakfasts I eat contain a big portion of butter. It is “soothing” to me.
I believe the relationship with food and how we feel in our bodies is just the tip of the iceberg, having its begging in deeper psychological aspects of our lives.
In these blog series, I tried to portray my journey towards food & body healing - hoping it could help someone too. I was not able to depict all my thoughts & feelings regarding this matter, yet I tried to make it clear, organized & easy to share.
I created a summary of all of the key aspects I wanted to point out and put the biggest emphasis on - the most important takeaway of what I tried to share with you. You can find it in the next blog post.
